Got all of my uni offers!! Now all I need is decent grades (which I could get if I stopped napping and started working) and I’ll be in Liverpool next year, exciting stuff
Trafford Centre is a fucking nightmare at Christmas, half an hour after being in there I was trying to escape. Purchased all the dog’s presents for her ‘VIP: Very Important Pet’ stocking though… Looks like she’ll be the only one with any presents at this rate
Scares me so easily things have slipped back into routine. Also scares me how happy it makes me
Last night did not go the way I’d expected it to
So fucking stupid getting my hopes up about Friday night when I know I will end up upset on Saturday with a sinking feeling of disappointment.
The more I think about next year the more excited I am. So keen to move away, more than likely to Liverpool, and meet new people etc etc, I also seem to have this picture in my head of me becoming a stereotypical English student and reading books in quiet cafes and drinking nice coffees that I won’t be able to afford
I can’t decide what’s worse: to miss someone so much that that there’s a near constant ache in your tummy that gets reinforced with every reminder, or to start to move on. Because with moving on comes forgetting, and I don’t want to forget anything. Not your smile when you were wondering if you were in trouble, not your terrible singing or the way you forgot the words to every song, not the way you purposely wound me up and then purposely made me laugh when you were worried you’d gone too far. Or any of the drunken walks home, the spontaneous kisses, your breathing as you slept, the time when you pushed me off the bed and then laughed for ages.
I’ve spent the whole day reading my friend leonard by james frey from start to finish (again) and I cried at the end (again) and I feel so lost today (again) even though it felt as though things were getting better
'we talk for three or four minutes and it hurts for three or four days'